You can also download a docx. or pdf. version of the checklist here.

Checklist Instructions:

Use this checklist to assess your relationships—whether intimate, friendship, family, or workplace—to recognize signs of abuse. Abuse can take many forms, including physical, emotional, psychological, financial, and verbal. If you check multiple items, it may indicate an unhealthy or abusive relationship.

• Physical Abuse
  0 Does this person hit, shove, slap, or physically harm you in any way?
  0 Do they restrain you or block you from leaving a space?
  0 Have they ever threatened to hurt you or someone you care about?
  0 Do you feel physically unsafe around them?
• Emotional & Psychological Abuse
  0 Do they frequently criticize, belittle, or humiliate you?
  0 Do they gaslight you (make you doubt your own memories or perception of reality)?
  0 Do they isolate you from friends, family, or support systems?
  0 Do they use guilt, blame, or manipulation to control your actions?
  0 Do they ignore your feelings or make you feel unworthy?
• Verbal Abuse
  0 Do they yell, scream, or use degrading language toward you?
  0 Do they make cruel jokes or insults at your expense?
  0 Do they threaten you with harm or make you feel intimidated?
  0 Do they mock or dismiss your concerns when you express them?
• Financial Abuse
  0 Do they control your access to money or financial resources?
  0 Do they force you to account for every expense or take your money without permission?
  0 Do they prevent you from working or sabotage your career opportunities?
  0 Do they use financial dependence to manipulate or trap you in the relationship?

• Sexual Abuse & Coercion
  0 Do they pressure, force, or manipulate you into sexual activities you’re uncomfortable with?
  0 Do they ignore your boundaries or refuse to take “no” for an answer?
  0 Do they use threats, guilt, or blackmail to control your sexual choices?
  0 Do they make unwanted sexual comments or engage in non-consensual physical contact?
• Digital & Technological Abuse
  0 Do they monitor your phone, social media, or online activity without consent?
  0 Do they send you excessive messages or demand instant responses?
  0 Do they spread rumors, share private information, or use technology to harass you?
  0 Do they control your online presence or restrict your digital communication?
• Workplace Abuse
  0 Do they create a hostile work environment by bullying, harassing, or intimidating you?
  0 Do they undermine your work, take credit for your achievements, or sabotage your success?
  0 Do they pressure you to work beyond reasonable hours without compensation or rest?
  0 Do they manipulate you into doing tasks outside of your role under threat of consequences?
• Recognizing Patterns & Seeking Help
  • Do you often feel afraid, anxious, or tense around this person?
  • Have your self-esteem or confidence suffered because of their actions?
  • Have trusted friends or family expressed concern about this relationship?
  • Do you feel trapped or unable to leave due to fear, guilt, or financial dependence?

If you recognize multiple signs on this list, consider seeking support from trusted friends, family, or professionals. Abuse is never acceptable, and help is available.